Представьте себе ситуацию, что вы попросили своего коллегу, отправляющегося по делам в город, купить где-нибудь по дороге вашу любимую газету, которую вы не успели приобрести с утра. Если он ответит «Постараюсь», то вы, скорее всего, сами выйдете в обеденный перерыв из офиса и купите эту газету, не надеясь на коллегу. Почему? Дело в том, что в самой этой фразе заложена возможность невыполнения просьбы.

Согласитесь, что от фраз «постараюсь», «попробую», «попытаюсь» веет неопределенностью, неуверенностью или даже отсутствием намерения достичь цели, что и проявляется в речи человека.

Алан Пиз в своей книге «Говорите точно… Как научиться убеждать и добиваться успеха» также уделяет внимание использованию данных фраз в общении и говорит о том, что их используют чаще всего люди, которые привыкли к неудачам. Говоря подобным образом, они как бы стараются заранее сообщить вам, что они могут и не добиться успеха в порученном деле.

По мнению Пиза, фразы «постараюсь», «попробую», «попытаюсь» несут в себе ожидание неудачи. И если человека действительно она постигнет, он только разведет руками и скажет «Что ж! Я пытался», подтверждая тем самым, что он и раньше сомневался в своих способностях выполнить задание.

Если вы слышите подобные фразы от вашего собеседника в ответ на вашу просьбу, попросите человека подтвердить, действительно ли он сделает то, что говорит, или вам не стоит полагаться на его слова.

И конечно, лучше не использовать подобные фразы самим. При этом вид коммуникации не важен. Эти фразы звучат одинаково фальшиво как при общении с супругом или приятелем, так и при общении со своим руководством или своими избирателями.

Особенно важно забыть эти фразы, когда вы формулируете свои цели на будущее, планируете свой следующий день или неделю. Все эти «постараюсь», «попробую», «попытаюсь» будут восприниматься вашим мозгом как дела, которые можно не делать, так как из них все равно не выйдет толк. Слова «я сделаю» звучат значительно лучше и убедительнее, чем слова «я постараюсь» или «сделаю все, что смогу». Согласны?

Поэтому оставьте данные фразы неуверенным в себе людям, которые сами не знают, чего им ждать от себя завтра!

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